off, and jogging

well we read in atlantic city. did you know that monopoly was modeled after atlantic city? it smells like fish, AC. there is a huge feral cat colony and a handicapped hotel bathroom there.

on the way up in the car i wrote some monopoly poems. here they are:

Free Parking

Driving around to find a meter with money on it. Forced up and at 'em. A sheet on the middle seat. You had to be in control of the soda so that sand would get in it. Sand got between our teeth or at least that's how I remember it.

The Boot

Its elvin curve and relief.
It's benign, yet unapologetic, scampering singularly through your
housing developments and eminent domains.
Money is no object to the demure boot.
They use the rubber band from broccoli.
The boot wants out; doesn't want tactics;
wants a stump and a toadstool.

B&O Railroad

The guard walks over and squats onto one knee.
Guard: "I don't know what you think you're doing."
A kid climbs into a chained-off train car.
The roundhouse sounds like most museums.


That they are constructed from wood.
That time has not plasticized as in the negative spaces and that spinny thing.
Kit-like, and kitchy when compartmentalized.
In the case of brass tokens, we hope you can make good choices.

Go to Jail

Stop this silliness.
Here, have a flat Coke.

The Scottie Dog

Why do they always look at the anus like that?

Oriental Ave.

Bill thought he was being politically correct. Cass was tired of it, this recollection with no regard for the way the last 50 years had actually happened, or altered the day's events. Her arthritic fingertips on the tabletop. The clicking ceiling fan. He grinned, Wrigley's gum clenched between his molars, mentioned his mother's ketchup sandwiches.

Electric Company

If one "Utility" is owned, rent is 4 times amount shown on dice.
If both "Utilities" are owned, we may be talking about the Constellation Energy Group. Good luck, chump, and budget billing. Rent from your sister. She feeds your cats. Do the stairs once a week.


Take a ride on the Reading.
Advance to St. Charles Place.
Your money matures.

Every morning you emerge from the comforter fetal and swollen. If you knew the pride I take in shepherding you into the world, as if otherwise you would remain perpetually in utero; calcify; wind up on the Discovery Channel having been happened upon by a witch doctor in some remote Casablancan village; or just keep sleeping. I get bored and stare.

The Iron

Timing of Buying and Trading

You can build or trade at any time, but etiquette suggests that such transactions occur only between the turns of other players.

If you see an opponent land on another player's property and the owner doesn't notice, it is in your best interest to say nothing.

Other people playing the same game as you. The person you love most in the world. People you give money to when they need it, little boot, otter, dear one. People who pay you.

Maarvin Gaardens

The Color

As with the cadmium discrepancy, the 20-dollar-bill's matte finish differs from the board background. Mint and freshly minted. My laundry dampens barking dogs.


I just wanted to go around a couple of times.
It's not the masculinity, but an inability to attend--
to strategy; tactics; long-term planning.
Also the potential to build on the reds and gentrify
until the color is not quite the right kind.

Saaint Jaames Plaace

Rich Uncle Pennybags

On the way from Bar Harbor to Halifax, my Dad disappeared into the ferry while we watched The Lion King even though we were too old. Another time he became a day trader, then a stamp collector, then a master gardener. Now he's putting in a pond. When he emerged, his eyes were all red.

Community Chest

I'd lay on 'em too, if I could.


Cerulean and shine interior, if that's not too painterly. Holders in shapes. Sky-like in the money; sky in Maryland over corn but not in Wyoming; not that green-y like in Utah. Foil exterior. This spaceship of a board game will teach you all you need to know about the economy and your family. Flat navy embossed lightly on paperboard betrays its making, and then on the boardwalk, back to true blue basics; welcome home. Vermont mist, Connecticut mist, Oriental missed the mark on the Deluxe Edition; it leans more toward purple when what I had in mind were rugs or even people.

Baltic Ave.

You were always my favorite.
The plum.
The sound.

Ventnor Ave.

Its proximity to other homonyms and lemon innards
The proximity of die-cast to the real deal,
as in what my bladder has in common with the thimble

I heard there are pools in every hotel.

The Way it Folds

Like a map; like something untethered; like the trick of leaves turning over in the weather. I hear the casino workers are on strike. I hear the firefighters did a bad thing. Cheat the fold; cut the teeth and fold the hand.


Collect your salary. Direct deposit. A gift card to Target.
A kid's mom gives you a crystal candy dish. Etiquette demands that you write a thank-you note. Then the kid brings you Munchkins, then another thank-you note, margarita mix, thank you, all the fixins for an Italian dinner, thank you, thank you, a plant for Easter. Thank you. You watch the kid get fatter and fatter, watch her stutter not get any better. She is your favorite one.

The Money

You never use it all anyway.
This will be okay.


Justin Sirois said...

You rocked it in AC. I wish I could cram that much awesome into one car ride's worth of work.

And I love it when you blog.


lauren bender said...

i will make an effort to blog on vacation. first i have to make an effort to shower and take care of other basic needs.

nice picture, btw